Fuck Off Friday

Life is wonderful, joyous, and fulfilling.  #unicornsandrainbows  At times, it can also be as annoying as fuck! #anytimeaccidentallywatchingcnn

Some things that people do and/or say can be very frustrating.  A quick example would be a person who says, "FUSTRATING."  #seriouslyfuckoffanddie

No one has ever been taught that incorrect spelling or that incorrect pronunciation.  The "R" is not silent.  You aren't speaking Portuguese where "Royce" is pronounced "Hoyce."  #spellingbeesarehard

Anytime anyone who is paid to be on camera or on the radio says "FUSTRATING, FUSTRATED, or FUSTRATION," they should immediately be fired and then have their asses kicked by Royce Gracie.  Maybe the ass kicking is a bit much. #overtheline

Now to the topic at hand, people who use common phrases incorrectly.  Hypothetically speaking if someone "ratted me out" for something I did at work, and I responded with "why did you throw me over the bus,"  it is fair to say that I would be considered a "FUCKING MORON," clinically speaking.  #pagingdoctorfhomosexualslur

One specific phrase is used over and over again, and the Rhodes scholars that use it the most usually say it wrong.  Not only do they say it wrong, but their version is the exact opposite of what they think they are saying. #fuckyounofuckme

When someone is being really boring or talking about something that is uninteresting and you being the prick that you are want to make them feel bad by overemphasizing the fact that you do not care at all about them or what they are saying, a certain phrase is used.  Instead of saying "I don't care," assholes drive the point home with a sledge hammer by saying, "I couldn't care less!"  #petergabrielrocks

The message that you are sending is that your caring level is at absolute zero or negative infinity (it couldn't be less) and the implied "Fuck you!"  On the spectrum of caring spanning from "every moment of my life is wrapped up in caring about it/my existence depends on it" to "absolutely zero amount of caring," you are making it clear that you DON'T FUCKING CARE EXCLAMATION MARK. #zerofucksgiven

Concept is clear.  Words are important and have meaning.  The problem comes in when you don't have the brain power to actually think before you speak.  Mindlessly parroting clichés incorrectly without knowing what you are saying is not a recipe for success.  When the words you choose convey the exact opposite of what you intend, you need a mandatory back alley meeting with Royce Gracie. #ktfo

Instead of using the casual and civil "I'm not really interested in that" or the harsher "I don't care," many jackasses go with the moron version of the cliche, "I COULD CARE LESS!"  So the intent is to make the other person feel stupid about a topic that you care zero about, but the message is anything but that.  The statement let's anyone who hears it know that you care an amount that is somewhere greater than zero all the way up to "every waking moment of your life depends on it."  #deadlycomboofassholeandstupid

It's the ultimate backfire, but the asshole is too clueless to realize it. #speakingofclueless

The response to "I could care less." should always be, "So, how much do you care?"

"I said I could care less."

"I know, so how much do you care? 10 percent? 20 percent? 100 percent?"

"What are you stupid?  Zero percent!"

"So, how is it possible for you to care less being that you said that you COULD?"  #lessthanzero