Chipotle Sneeze Shield

I love Mexican food, specifically burritos, more specifically bean, rice and guacamole burritos. Most Mexican restaurants don't have a good vegetarian burrito, so I end up ordering my special custom burrito not found anywhere on the menu. No cheese, beans, rice, guacamole, dry. Over the years, I've been to many Mexican restaurants from the Taco Bells, Del Tacos, Green Burritos to the El Toritos, Baja Fresh, El Ranchitos, Titos, Acapulcos to the El Cholos and Javiers.

 

You'd think the old adage, "you get what you pay for" would hold true, and the more you pay the better the burrito. I've found this not to be the case. The farther you go to the right on the price axis does not put you higher on the taste axis. A fifteen dollar burrito at Javiers is not fifteen times better than a ninety-nine cent burrito from the Bell or the Del.

After many years of research as an amateur burritologist, the evidence points to a clear winner. You must understand that these results are based on non-meat, non-dairy burritos. The clear winner is Chipotle, hands down, no contest. They recently just raised their prices, but it's still the best deal around. The service is fast even with a line out the front door, and you get exactly what you want. Vegetarian burrito double wrapped, extra extra rice, black beans, a little veggie fajitas, a little mild tomato salsa and guacamole, done. $5.95 plus tax. I have never weighed this bad boy, but at its smallest it is still over a pound. One of these, plus chips and guacamole is enough food for the day. Aside from the perfect burrito, the restaurant made chips and the fresh guacamole are not to be missed. For you carnivorous types the selection is chicken, barbacoa beef, steak and carnitas (ingredients). If you are interested in a good burrito and you haven't tried Chipotle, you are missing out.

This brings us to the sneeze shield/glass barrier to keep every customer's individual personal filth out of the delicious ingredients on the other side. A simple concept, right? It isn't stained glass. It isn't frosted glass. It is very clean and very transparent. To make things easier for even the dullest of new or returning customers, the workers are well versed in every one of the ingredients, and they guide you through the decision making process by asking you what you want.

Gestures are not necessary unless for some reason you find yourself mute without the capabilities of writing down your choices on a piece of paper. If you find yourself in this particular rare circumstance and you feel the need to point at the specific ingredients you want, you can do it from your side of the glass. The magic of transparent glass is that you can see through it and so can the Chipotle professional on the other side. If you prefer pinto beans over black beans, you can point at the pinto beans and get pinto beans. You want chicken as your meat, then point at the chicken. Keep your filthy fucking hands away from the food that other people are going to consume. Do not reach over the shield to point down at the food.

I am in no way a germophobe, but come on idiots! In these circumstances, I totally see the need for double thick, bullet-proof, bank glass separating the food from the fool.